My prayer today...

So I get these daily emails from Divorce Care that are very encouraging and oftentimes nail my emotions on the head. This happens on a pretty regular basis, I don't know how they do it when I don't call them and tell them how I'm feeling on a regular basis but, they get it right 9 out of 10 times!

Anyway, I'm feeling very vulnerable and emotional lately because of so many things, #1)being A-L-O-N-E. It's not a very fun place to be and I am still, and may forever be, trying to figure out where I fit now that my fairy tale turned out to just be a large pumpkin and some field mice...

Anyway, I opened my inbox today to find this as today's daily encouragement: "Rob began to question God at that point, asking, "Where is the love? My heart still feels empty inside." He realized that God wanted him to understand that he was trying to fill his heart with something that could not truly satisfy his needs. Rob [ARIKA] desired to be loved, accepted, and celebrated just the way [s]he was, imperfections and all. He realized that Jesus Christ is the only Person who could love him to that deep degree, the only One who could love him unconditionally. "Mortals make elaborate plans, but GOD has the last word. Humans are satisfied with whatever looks good; GOD probes for what is good. Put GOD in charge of your work, then what you've planned will take place" (Proverbs 16:1-3 Msg). Lord Jesus, You have loved me with an everlasting love. I give all my hopes and plans, faults and imperfections to You. Amen."

So, when I lost my life companion I was upset and then seemed to get over it but I find today that the emotions are just as raw as they were in December. Possibly rubbed raw by new problems and hurts but all the same they're still bleeding. I've found that now that I've lost someone that was supposed to stay forever it's hard to find where I belong again.

I don't belong here...

I got my first hug today since January and I literally fell to pieces. Yep, I'm just sad. So, here I am again God...please help me and take away this sadness...